End of Term Revue: Best of the Lectures
Lecture no. 11
Dear Heart,
Ten weeks is roughly the length of an academic term. In which case, this lecture is a good opportunity to pause and look back over the lectures I’ve written so far. I was curious to see what the recurring lessons were, if any. Doubtless, some lessons are for me rather than the reader.
Is it possible to do a Best Of? Let’s see. My pencil is poised.
I intended the pieces to be an entertaining series of potted lectures; I like the idea of Svelte Learning, or ‘fun size’ lessons. It’s interesting that the phrase ‘fun size’, often used in confectionary, implies that small is somehow fun in itself. Perhaps the thinking is to do with childhood, when one has more licence for play.
It is perhaps no surprise that I take an almost erotic delight from the Travel Toiletries section of the larger pharmacies. All those miniature shampoos and deodorants, like accessories for a overgrown dolls’ house. Perhaps a psychoanalyst would see this interest as evidence of my own refusal to grow up, whatever that may mean. That may be true. Regardless, I’m obsessed with conciseness as an ideal, from the well-tailored suit, to the well-honed sentence, to the mechanics of wit, with the quotable one-liner. But I also just find the idea of travel-sized deodorants funny.
Whether or not the pieces are entertaining is moot. But I’m fairly confident that they are different. I often feel like the most different person in the room, even when I’m by myself. And not necessarily in a good way. One person’s idea of original is another’s idea of failure. Whenever I see the word ‘inclusive’, I think, ‘they have yet to meet me’. The ideal is to be different, but never too different. Nevertheless, I always strive to write something unusual, rather than an attempt to join in.
I am proud of these pieces. I wish I wasn’t so slow, but that can’t be helped. Each lecture involved pencils, pens, Post-Its, a PC, and print-outs. Each one took many hours to research, write, and polish, but only five minutes to read. This must be how animators feel.
Still, no one tells off Donna Tartt for putting out one novel every ten years and doing nothing else. Okay, they do tell her off, but that’s not the point.
So here is a guide to the first term of lectures, with links to the archive, and with what I think are the most quotable lines. The older lectures require a paid subscription, but it’s a modest sum that will make all the difference to your well-being. And to mine, frankly.
TERM ONE:
Gaps in the CV are how the light gets in.
A statement of intent, and a defence of digression. I love the theory (not mine) that there’s a dyspraxic character in Jane Eyre.
2. Angela Carter, the Beatles, and the Camp Explosion of the 1960s
All writing is memoir, one way or another. And all reviews review the reviewer.
Looking at this now, I can see I was still stuck in bad academic mode, throwing research at the reader without allowing for my own insights. This is called ‘the washing line essay’. It’s like saying ‘here’s something interesting I found… and here’s something else’, and thinking that will do. And that’s no good. The research in this piece is interesting enough, but there’s not much of my own voice in it.
3. Postmodernism, Eurovision, and the War on Fun
Postmodernism caters for the occasions when modernism is not enough, or when it leaves people out.
This statement is far too valuable and wise, even for me. And it’s not a shallow quip: I provide footnotes!
4. Heartstopper, Carry on Loving, and Skeuomorphic Youth
Otherness can solve the problem of how best to rebel against one’s elders (often for the sake of it), while conforming with one’s peers (often for the sake of it).
I’m proud of getting the word ‘skeuomorphic’ into a piece about the comic Heartstopper, while referencing Carry On Loving, Aubrey Beardsley, George Orwell, and Donald McGill. This is evidence that I am a genius, and you are welcome to say you knew me when I was nothing.
5. The Smiths, Role Models, and Building a Camp Library
Owning a copy of Against Interpretation now means that you too can accessorize like Harry Styles.
Rare yet useful connections on the theme of camp, from The Smiths to Zadie Smith. If you are going to talk seriously about camp, don’t stop at Sontag.
6. Building a Camp Library Part 2: Quentin Crisp, David Bowie, Evelyn Waugh
Sometimes, the stumbling method can be the best way to open minds.
Vile Bodies is, according to Quentin Crisp, the funniest book ever written. It also inspired the David Bowie song ‘Aladdin Sane’.
7. Virginia Woolf’s Orlando: the private joke that never gets old
On choosing from a varied body of work like Woolf’s:
It’s having a favourite Doctor Who. You can choose a favourite, and in doing so you can say something about yourself.
It’s easy to forget that in the 1920s, Orlando outsold Mrs Dalloway and To The Lighthouse. Not bad for a private joke.
8. Suffolk, Arcadia, and Shakespeare’s Flowers
There is no doubting the message: not just beauty in nature but persistence, renewal, and hope.
This lecture was perhaps the most unexpected thing I’ve written, knowing little as I do about flowers. But I still managed to get a line from Ronald Firbank in there, which makes it more me. I love that I provide an update to a 1969 book which said that cowslips were in decline. Not today.
9. Wildness in a Corner: Jarman, Benton End, and Artists' Gardens
Gardening, like art, is a way for humans to improve themselves and each other and the world. And best of all, to do so across time.
Many words are slung in the name of Derek Jarman and Dungeness these days, but less so on Cedric Morris and Benton End. Things will be different when the refurbishments are done. It feels like there’s an army of the curious out there, ready to descend on Hadleigh.
10. Dorian Gray and Books as Talismans
When content has a fixed relationship with its host medium, there is a fellowship of embodiment.
In which books become talismans of identity, making people more like themselves. I’m rather pleased with the phrase ‘a fellowship of embodiment’. It’s an idea that can apply to any collection of objects: books, vinyl records, paintings, crisp packets. It’s all about keeping the right company.
Lecture 10 is manifestly much better than Lecture 2, with more of my own voice, and not too much research for the sake of it. So if nothing else, I’ve learned that to publish something regularly is to improve. Writing for publication is a muscle like any other, and needs to be kept supple.
I’ll begin a new term of lectures shortly. In the meantime, do feel free to send me any requests you might have for future subjects.
And thank you for reading this far.
Your friend,
Dr Dickon
Bildeston, Suffolk
I'm now going to imagine you writing all your letters poised on the sofa with one of your mother's quilts.